This Little Red Box

Here it is. This precious gift. I thought long an hard about what to give you. I wondered what would show my feelings the best. I couldn't find a card that said everything I needed it to say and nothing that I could buy would express every emotion I wished to convey. I finally decided to take the most direct route and just show it all. Here is this little red box, topped with this big red bow I have poured everything that I have and all that I have left to show. It's not much but it cost me the world. This little red box inconspicuously holds all the tiny shards of my heart.

Time Inflames my Wounds

Emotional wounds are funny things. They never completely heal. While time heals physical wounds, it only inflames the not so tangible ones. I've been broken so many times and when I think it couldn't possibly hurt any worse it opens up and bleeds everywhere again. They tear open with memory triggers. Something someone says, a song from back in the day, a picture, a smell. . .anything associated with those painful memories can tear me wide open again. The blood coats everything in my life, discolouring it with my poisonous grief. Fresh tears burn my wounds and destroy any semblance of stability I might have been able to build. When the whole world is crumbling around me and I have nothing left to hang onto, the jagged red pieces of my heart begin to close up filling in with scar tissue. But the dull ache will always remind me of the pain.

Friends

Memories of laughter shared, a shoulder to cry on, a person to care. Strong arms to hold me tight, block out the darkness, shine in the light. Winds of change, rains of pain, stone erodes but love remains. Stronger than all human plight, guiding forces in my life. There for me when everyone fails. Someone to trust with all of myself. Time will tell in the end but you can never loose a true friend.